The Rat finds millions of good reasons not to fix faulty date code
Connecting state and local government leaders
Packet Rat R. Fink The year 2000 crisis has finally gained our chief executive's attention, at least budgetwise. The Rat rejoices that his late-night rap sessions with Al and Tipper have paid off, but it is a little late. The fiscal 2000 budget proposal, even if approved on time, doesn't kick in until October. That leaves three months to apply the information technology funds to emergency triage.
Packet Rat The year 2000 crisis has finally gained our chief executive's attention, at least The Rat rejoices that his late-night rap sessions with Al and Tipper have paid off, but The whiskered one isn't surprised. Most agencies have had year 2000 readiness For the last five years, the cyberrodent has tried everything short of holding his After once more counting up the potential software failures at his agency, the Rat He envisioned receiving the following direct-deposit notice on the first payday in 'If you choose not to take this leave in the next 30 days, unused leave days will That's right. If the fixes don't go in soon at the agency's aging Naturally there will be long lines at the airport after reservation systems crash. On There is that nagging worry about embedded avionics systems failing, however. Maybe the Traffic on that particular Saturday will likely be light, especially if the power grid If the Rat decides not to make a run for the border, however, there are still a few For one thing, he'll finally have an excuse to make boat anchors and artificial For another, the furry one's favorite old passwords will have new life. All he has But in the meantime, here's the ultimate reason to hope for year-end bedlam: job The Packet Rat once managed networks but now spends his time ferreting out bad
R. Fink
budgetwise.
it is a little late. The fiscal 2000 budget proposal, even if approved on time,
doesn't kick in until October. That leaves three months to apply the information
technology funds to emergency triage.
plans under way for years, but planning ahead doesn't happen to be a valued
managerial trait in the Rat's chain of command.
breath, jumping up and down, and screaming to draw attention to the coming disaster. His
agency chief, however, has preferred any kind of distraction to cold, stark reality.
moaned. Then it suddenly occurred to him that it might be inadvisable to push the subject
further. Foot-dragging, it seems, could have certain unanticipated benefits.
2000: 'By our calculations, you have accumulated 99 years' worth of unused
leave.
be bought back, and you will be automatically credited with $8,793,123.22.'
payroll system, the Rat can look forward to living the life of a lottery winner. And if he
decides to take the money and run, he anticipates little trouble in terms of
transportation.
the other hand, the takeoff queues will be short because the planes will be stuck at the
gates. The bare-tailed one wonders if it might not be easier to fly his accidental
millions across the border in his own little jet.
Rat will just drive. The toll gates in the EZ-Pass lanes will probably be stuck in the
default vertical position.
crashes, as predicted. And the cyberrodent is betting that much of America will stand
around in towels for a while, waiting for the water pressure to be restored.
things that will keep life interesting back at the office.
reefs out of all those ancient Zenith Data Systems Z-248s that he has been forcing the
underclass to use for network access.
to do is not use up his grace log-ins after the passwords expire at the end of 1999, and
he might not get a prompt for a new password until 2099.
security.' n
packets in cyberspace. E-mail him at rat@gcn.com.